I apologized to her. I don’t do it usually. I always thought that she is the one who always picks up a fight with me, she complains over petty issues, and she is the one who responds arrogantly if a small misunderstanding arises. I knew I don’t deserve this kind of treatment. No one deserves it. I always hated her for being arrogant and then apologizing to me, justifying her behavior, and blaming the heat of the moment.
Whenever she talked to me that way, I retorted back in the same way. Later, she used to apologize, but I never did. And everything got back to normal. But today, it was a different situation. I talked to her arrogantly because I couldn’t keep my cool and lost control over my emotions in the heat of the moment. Yes, I understood what heat of the moment is. Everything she used to say, to which I called unreasonable, manipulation, and justification, was not what I thought it was. Though I’ve hurt her, I was hurt too. I realized I am affected when I climbed one more floor of my building, knocked the door, and saw the face of that annoying aunty who always taunts me on getting lower paying job than her son. When she welcomed me with her annoying giggle, I came to my senses. My home was on the second floor and I was on the third. Out of embarrassment I said I was their for a tea. I don’t even drink tea. But that’s what I could think of at that time.
I think I shouldn’t have hated her as much as I hated. Now I know what happens and what goes through her mind. The crazy fact is, just because we hurt our loved ones, doesn’t mean we don’t get hurt. We get affected too. And we feel horrible about it when we realize it. She knew it. So she accepted my apology like a lady, not like a baby, the way I do it.
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