“Don’t do this to yourself! You deserve better. She is gone,” commanded Ritvik to Dushyant, banging door of Dushyant’s room. Danny and Pritam also tried to convince him to open the door.
“Leave me alone! Jussssss go,” replied Dushyant from inside his room.
Dushyant was drunk for entire two days after love of his life, Antara, left him. She left him because she was getting married as per her parents’ wishes.
Dushyant was handsome, intelligent, charming, emotional, and carefree. He was straight-forward, but not arrogant. He enjoyed solitude, but was not a loner. His good looks with well-built body flaunted his well-natured demeanor. An ideal boyfriend every girl wants to have. People had a playboy image when they saw him. But, the reality was different. Besides his good looks, loyalty was the most valuable asset of him. He was madly in love with beautiful, smart, witty, but dominating and arrogant girl, Antara. The love he bestowed upon her made her feel like a princess. She was two years older than him. They were in the same college in Varanasi.
His friends were banging the door continuously. Dushyant did not care. He was burning everything regarding their relationship to on that day with tears in his eyes. It did not make him feel better. The wildfire of pain inside his heart was scorching him than the heat of that fire. He burnt everything, but he stopped at a moment when he saw the only thing remaining to get burnt. The diary.
He looked for a moment at diary, wiped his tears, and opened the door. They abruptly went inside. Danny extinguished fire and other two inspected the room to ensure that he had done nothing wrong. All they could see was more than 10 empty bottles and a half empty bottle of alcohol, things scattered everywhere and Dushyant standing at the door with a diary in hand. They were puzzled when they noticed that he was staring in blank space.
“Just sit down,” commanded Danny.
“I wannaaaa meet her. Right nowwwww!” slammed Dushyant.
“You are out of your mind. Just sit down,” said Pritam.
“No, you are out of your mind! My life is ruined, and it will be devastated if I don’t meet her right now,” retorted Dushyant in clear voice.
“Why do you want to meet her?” asked Ritvik.
“I burnt everything, but couldn’t burn thisssss,” he replied, showing them diary, “And you all know the reason.”
* * *
Dushyant could barely stand straight. It was 10’o’clock in the night. They took him in Danny’s car to travel from Varanasi to Lucknow. Ritvik informed Antara that they were coming to her place. She refused initially, but agreed on one condition. This will be the last time she meets him. Only two days were left for her wedding day. It took them six hours to reach to her place. In those four hours, his friends did everything to make him little stable.
A cold breeze in the garden near her home was ready to witness the last meeting. She left home with her cousin sister. Dushyant and his friends were already there. Dushyant was sitting on a bench. As soon as they arrived, Ritvik gestured Danni and Pritam to leave them alone. They left him and went outside the garden. Antara asked her sister to leave them alone for some time. She agreed and joined boys outside.
Antara stared angrily at Dushyant for a while. He stared back blankly.
“What have you done to yourself?” said Antara in an anguished tone.
“Wow! The sword which gave me scars is asking me how I got these scars,” replied Dushyant.
“Why are you doing this? You know this is not possible. How many times do I have to tell you the same thing?”
“I know. This is not possible. I left all the hope. I left everything, friends, study, and family for some time. I got crazy. I used to talk to a tree about how much I loved you and how you are selfish and left me with nothing but shattered dreams. I burnt everything that reminded me I spent some moments with you. All the gifts and cards which meant nothing. But, I could not burn this.”
He showed her the diary.
“This is a diary you wrote for me. I read what’s inside. I know you expressed your feelings. But this is not enough. You have to understand. When caste, age, and honor are on the line, my parents will not consider this as worthy for allowing me to spend my life with you. Well, forget it; my wedding is in two days. So, just go. If you are trying to get me back, I am not coming with you.”
“I am not here to get you back. I am here to give you this diary. Burn it, because I can’t.”
“Give me! I’ll do it.”
“How easy it is for you to burn this! You know what, I shouldn’t have written it in those exam days. But, the thought of not meeting you again killed me and I wrote it instead of studying.”
“What are you talking about? You wrote it every day.”
“No, I didn’t. I lied to you that I was writing a diary for you. You remember you told me that I don’t get to meet you if I don’t bring this diary. And timing couldn’t be better. You demanded this when my fourth semester exams were going on. So, I went to market, bought a diary, four different pens, and started writing. I put earlier dates, used different pens, and spent four days to make it look real. My friends were telling me to study, but I didn’t. I thought I can give those exams again, but I can’t live if I lose you.”
“I didn’t know you were lying.”
“It wasn’t about lying; it was about the thought of not meeting you again. It was about the thought of losing you. It was about those genuine feelings. The dates were manipulated, but those feelings weren’t. And if you don’t understand that, it’s not worth ruining my life over you.”
He gave diary to her and left.
* * *
Dushyant woke up hearing banging on his room’s door. He looked at cellphone for time. It was 4’o’clock in the morning. Why anyone would come to me this early, he thought. He opened the door and choked. It was Antara with diary in hand. She came to Varanasi with her cousin brother and sister without knowledge of her parents.
“What are you doing here?” asked he.
“Can I come in and explain?” replied Antara.
“Who is there?” inquired Ritvik.
He woke up instantly and rubbed his eyes to make sure he was not dreaming.
“You came. Yesss! I knew you would come. I told him,” said Ritvik excitedly.
“No, I did not come back for what you are thinking. Would you please give us a moment?”
He left the room.
“I also can’t burn your diary. I know feelings you expressed in this diary are genuine. I read it once and I read it again. For one second, it made me run away from there and hug you. And, you wrote it in only four days despite your exams, because you could not imagine losing me. This was the most romantic thing anyone can do for a girl. It was a beautiful lie. Initially, I thought you were only making up for your lies, but this tells me how much you loved me. And, I loved you for every small thing you did for me. You used to come to Lucknow after i got job here after graduation. You used to meet me, stay in the hotel despite your family lives there, and leave on next day. It made me feel special. The bitter truth is, I was being so selfish. I never gave anything to this relationship. I only demanded from you. You never complained. You don’t deserve me. You deserve someone better,” confessed Antara with teary eyes.
Tears rolled down from eyes of Dushyant. He wasn’t prepared for this confrontation.
“You don’t have to do anything. Just be there with me,” he replied.
“No! It’s too late now. I can’t put their reputation on the line. I can’t be selfish with parents. They gave me everything and never expected anything in return just like you. I made mistake by being selfish with you, I don’t want to make the same mistake again. I hope you understand. I am here to give you this diary. I wrote it in one day for you. I have written how I feel about you, how selfish I was and how you showered love to make my life beautiful. I am keeping your diary with me for the rest of my life and I want you to keep this diary with you.”
Dushyant took that diary.
“Please, don’t leave me.”
“I have to go as soon as possible. If my father will be furious if they find me out I am not in my room on a day before my wedding. I’m so sorry and thank you for all those beautiful moments. You are a great person. You will find someone who loves you. Goodbye!”
She kissed him on chick and left. Dushyant cried bitterly after she left.
He never tried to contact her. He used to read that diary under the same tree he used to talk to. In the end, he won her heart though he lost her love.
The crazy fact is, a beautiful lie overshadows a bitter truth.
(Image courtesy of tiverylucky at FreeDigitalPhotos.net)