I Can’t, I Just Can’t Pretend To…

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I can’t, I just can’t pretend to be happy for others’ success, triumphs, achievements
While I haven’t achieved anything yet that I can be happy for

I can’t, I just can’t pretend to feel happy for a couple in a relationship
Enjoying each others’ company, while I can’t express my feeling to a girl I like

I can’t, I just can’t pretend to feel good for a guy who got tattoo on his arm
And I still see nothing on my hand, not even a scar

I can’t, I just can’t pretend to feel happy for that guy who passed the interview
And got the job, while I never wanted that job and failed

I can’t, I just can’t pretend to feel happy for anybody living their dreams
Whereas I don’t have courage to follow mine and blame others for it

I can’t, I just can’t pretend to see those pictures of vacations a friend posted
Whereas I want to sit in home on holidays and only think about that hill station

I can’t, I just can’t pretend to feel satisfied for those who follow the crowd and be happy
Whereas I’m neither following the crowd nor swimming against the current

I can’t, I just can’t pretend to smile when that irritating guy cracks a silly joke
Everybody laughs, while I don’t have a good sense of humor either

I can’t, I just can’t pretend to like that girl who is beautiful and witty and
Expects every guy to follow her, whereas I am attracted to her too

I can’t, I just can’t pretend to be everything fine when it’s not
Whereas when a relative asks how it’s going, I say fine

I can’t, I just can’t pretend to be excited when I see friends driving car
Whereas I didn’t learn to drive when I had opportunity to

I can’t, I just can’t pretend to be fine when anybody makes and honest mistake
Whereas I expect them to understand me when I make mistakes

I can’t, I just can’t pretend to act with formalities and follow etiquette
Whereas I greet in the morning and evening to look a good guy

I can’t, I just can’t pretend to enjoy when I’m hanging out friends
Whereas I envy those who laugh together while hanging out and I’m alone

I can’t, I just can’t pretend to appreciate those who work for material gains
Whereas I work for appreciation and instant gratification

I can’t, I just can’t pretend to believe in my closed ones
Whereas I expect them to believe in me and seek their support

I can’t, I just can’t pretend to be happy when I’m not
Whereas the crazy fact is, I can’t do anything that will make me happy


(Image courtesy of Danilo Rizzuti at FreeDigitalPhotos.net)

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Hollow Success

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PHOTO PROMPT Copyright – Marie Gail Stratford

“I ain’t going to meet my parents,” said Kevin to his aunt, at the breakfast.

“Why not?” replied aunt.

“I have a lot of work, many cases are pending. I can’t.”

“So?? When you were 5 years old, your father’s left eye was injured; though he went to drive taxi to earn a daily bread. Your mother used to add water in milk due to lack of money to make ends meet. At least respect that. Take these chopsticks, go there & toast marshmallows. They will be more than happy.”

He agreed.

The crazy fact is, when sacrifices done behind the scenes are overshadowed after tasting success, it’s a hollow success.

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This Post Is Also A Part Of  Friday Fictioneers.

Ohh No!! I Can’t Say Adios..

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And the call for job interview came.  I passed the aptitude test. But the bitter thing was that it was on the same day as the farewell party of college. In the morning there was a project competition & in the afternoon- farewell party.

I had to choose one. Actually I had no option than going for an interview. I was baffled by the fact that should I be happy for selection or sad by not being there. As I had to go for an interview.

The interview didn’t go well. The reason was not the attention towards farewell, but lack of clarity of purpose for applying for job. I could not made it to next round. But I wasn’t more upset about it, but missing the last moments with my friends.

I had fun when my friend recalled the joy which he had & I felt so bad that I missed it as well as the job.

I missed the whistles blowing in front of our stubborn & strict disciplined head of department. I missed the weirdest award distribution which included categories like Mango Man, Lady Dabangg, Cuttie Pie which was awarded to a male & chanting of different names whenever each category was announced.

Every moment I wanted to accumulate in my heart. The last moments in classroom was more precious than any other regular class. The hooting of the name of guy’s crush in front of teachers, everyone in a state of delirium, no worries of future, only cherishing the present, I really missed that.

The most favorite part I missed – They gave a long white cloth to express ourselves, so that when we will not be there, they will cherish our memories we posted there. I wanted to write many things over there, but they are now inside only.

The crazy fact is, it is easy to read the quotes about ‘sacrifice’, but when it comes to actually doing it, the pain of losing one thing for another is inevitable.

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(Image courtesy of photostock / FreeDigitalPhotos.net)

Share Your Stories about Sacrifice you’ve done & missed something that you cannot retain..